Comments? Concerns?

I am very excited and nervous about the vast numbers of new followers I have gotten (thank you to all three of you!).

Today was kind of rough. Sometime before lunch I got this sickening feeling that none of my coworkers liked me. That I had done something to upset the delicate balance of love and hate that resides within this absurd retail family.
Clues to this sad but possible conclusion: I asked my manager to do a cash count because I had let a dollar fall out of my pocket and although I was sure it was mine, I didn't want to take a chance on the warmth of Loss Prevention. The first manager I asked ignored me completely. The second manager was putting up new mylars and gave me a very irritated look, but complied with my request. Unfortunately, our new change counter doesn't have the strip in the back to indicate the amount of change, so the person counting has to pull it all out and put in on the scale. He seemed a little high strung. End result: I got my dollar.

After lunch I had the pleasure of moving all the DVDs which never sell from one top shelf to the other top shelf. Then I moved all the cig shelves up a few notches. And by "I" I mean me, and two dudes I work with. Those shelves are pretty heavy (at least to me, with my T-Rex arms) and there were several notches for them to get stuck in. Which they did. Which allowed me to send a flurry of Turkish Camels, Turkish Camel Golds, and Turkish Camel Silvers all around the register area. Also, at one point I was sure my balancing act consisting of me on a milk crate, shouting, holding a heavy shelf and losing merchandise, would result in my tooth loss. It was then I called for help. Finally, I got someone to help, and with him the job actually got done. What didn't help was the girl on the register turning around telling us that the shelves were uneven, and miscounting which shelves should move where. She offered unsolicited and unhelpful advice. Keep eating those almonds please.

By the end of the day it seemed that things were ok with my coworkers.

Ooh. I got four 60ct bonus packs of Tums and two Monsters for about $5. I had an in-store coupon, two mnf coupons, and two mnf-but-only-for-our-store-use coupons. Yes I am proud of myself. And FYI-when a coupon says "do not double" it does not mean the consumer can't use more than one during a transaction. It just means that when a store is doubling coupons, that type of coupon cannot be doubled, it has to be taken at face value.

The Cigar Reset

I'm back on the register for the next week or so, and I'm a little irritated about it. But today, to make sure I was staying on point, I pretended I was trying out for a shopper/cashier game show and I rung people up real fast. And I memorized a few more coupon codes. I'm on top of things.

A few hours into my shift I finally got a project. A cigar reset. Which proved to be more time-consuming than predicted. I left the top shelf a mess, with the promise I would finish it tomorrow. There may be more than a few misplaced mylars. But I'll figure it all out tomorrow.

2:45

I was scheduled from 7:30 am to 2:45 pm and I was super-excited. When I got to work at 7:28 am I asked my boss how many breaks I got for such a short shift. He looked confused and I reminded him he scheduled me only until 2:45. He said he meant to schedule me until 4:30 pm, like usual. I told him that because it was on the schedule, I was going to leave at 2:45. Thank you very much. He looked annoyed and said that was fine because we had a midshift. I got two breaks.

Ad Tags

All I did today was put up Ad Tags.

And I rung people up.

There was a bunch of stuff I wanted to take care of, but I didn't get around to it.

The Earache

My earache continues.

I seemed to have a lot of ignorant customers today, making my life difficult.

I'm not sure how to get my work in the Hallmark aisle done when the co-worker who was supposed to be at the register didn't show up. Apparently he has school, and he plans things badly.

Earaches and Job Offers

My ear hurt for most of the day, which made it hard to be cheerful.

I saw one of my regulars who said she is working part-time at a bar and I told her I always thought I would make a good bartender. She said she would ask her boss about getting me a part-time position. I will probably turn it down because I already have two jobs.

Another one of my regulars told me I have beautiful eyes (which is true, obviously!) and she thinks I look like Katy Perry. Very good. She also told me I should try to get into modeling. It sounds so much less dirty when another woman tells me these things, instead of an older man. I take the compliments either way, but I'm just saying.

$105. Are You F-ing K-ing Me?!

One of my first two customers of the day were these two little Asian girls. They were obviously on their way to school, with their cute pink backpacks. But first they had to swing by our Easter aisle. And they bought $105 worth of gum, Easter candy, regular candy, and one gift bag. These girls are starting to become my regulars, and the little one always purchases a ridiculous amount of candy. The least I've rung her up for is $60. The guy behind her in line said "I want her job." Seriously, she either has awful money sense, or her parents make bank. Or both. All I know is I felt guilty when I spent $20 of my parent's money. Although I suppose it could be hers, but she certainly doesn't take long to save up a lot, especially for her age and spending habits. And I have always been leery of over-spending. Also, it amazes me that this kid is allowed to walk around with that much money. Whenever I had a lot of money saved up, my ma always brought me to the bank to make a deposit so I didn't lose it, or get it stolen from me. I would like to ask her a lot questions about the amount she is spending but I will not because that is rude.

No Projects!

I realize I haven't been posting, which is so totally tragic. I apologize to my three readers.

I haven't had any projects for the past two days. I give myself mini ones, (like cleaning out the Hallmark bays, organizing the deodorant overhead, puttering, and shuffling things around in the cos bay), but nothing too significant. And nothing to really hold my attention. All I can hope for is that whomever is watching the cameras sees that I am working without prompting.

Valentine's Day

It was super-crazy today. A bunch of people were getting their Valentine's stuff at the last minute. Some of these guys spent a lot of money. I think my highest ring-up was $97.
But the weirdest encounter was this:
I was in the Seasonal aisle and said "hi" to a customer. He turns and looks at me strangely, with a sideways smile. I ask if I can help him with something and he says "Don't I know you? Have we met before?" I look him over and shrug. The answer is no, of course.
"New York? I think I know you from the website."
The website? "No, I don't think that was me. Sorry." He continues to look at me kind of weirdly so I leave the aisle.

With all the stalkers and weirdos I attract, I have to admit I'm kind of surprised I didn't get any Valentine's from them.

Pull-Outs

Just the usual chaos. I spent the whole morning and some of the afternoon doing pull-outs and I would have gotten much more done if my boss hadn't printed out the wrong list.

New Schedule

Today was the first day of my new schedule. It was ok. But I kept thinking it was Monday.

Schedule Change and Visits

Today was kind of interesting because I was all over the place. When I came in, my EXA told me to go to the other store to pick up some mylars. On the drive over there I had a smoke, and when I got there I saw our old manager who had been transferred. So that was kind of nice. Turns out, I picked up the wrong mylars because my EXA doesn't know how to communicate well. So I went back to that store and got what we needed.

I did some work in Cosmetics; mostly stocking. Then I gave breaks because the floor guy is kind of useless. I got to head over to the Hallmark aisle and actually do some stocking. Our FedEx shipment of "everyday" cards finally came in. I really like the Hallmark aisle. I find it relaxing and I really enjoy the artwork and sentiments of cards. I think the idea of mailing cards is becoming a thing of the past, and that makes me sad.

Today was also the last day of my retail work week. I come back on Sunday. I will now be working Sunday through Thursday instead of Monday through Friday. So I only worked Monday through Thursday this week and I have to say, I'm digging this short work week. I have big plans tomorrow.

Coupons and Panties

Two women tried to scam me today. Not very well, of course.
Early this morning a woman came, and had me ring up two gallons of milk. She was on the phone, so I said nothing to her because people on the phone are one of my pet peeves. She stopped me and said "These aren't $1.99?"
"Nope."
"No? I thought they were."
"Ok. That was last week, I think."
"But my mother just bought some from your chain and it was $1.99."
"Where?"
"At your store."
"Yes, but which one?"
"The one down in DeKalb. It was advertised."
"Well, the only reason why their price would be different would be because it was about to expire. If it is advertised, bring in the ad and we'll see what we can do about a price adjustment."
"Fine."
She was all agitated and called her mother "mommy", which I think is a little weird.

This woman came in with a bunch of stuff and coupons, needing multiple transactions. I happily oblige, because I like all those things. What I didn't like was the fact that she had ripped the expiration dates of some, or possibly most, of her coupons. It was pretty obvious too.
"I can't use these, ma'am, because you ripped the expiration dates off."
"You won't use these?"
"No."
"Could you at least try to swipe them through? See if they work?"
"No. We need expiration dates on our coupons."
She makes me call the manager to confirm this.
Then she tries to tell me she is just bad at ripping coupons. I thought about asking her if she knew what scissors were, but decided against it. She also read the wrong price row, leading to a lengthy price check and a few arguments.
Bottom line is: I love coupons. But only if used appropriately. You can only purchase the item specified on the coupon. I need the expiration date intact. No stacking on manufacturers coupons. If I have to follow the rules, so do you.

I was ringing a lady up and complimented her on her beautiful dragonfly brooch. She didn't hear me and responded with a hostile "What?!" I repeated myself and her demeanor and voice changed drastically. She did not need a bag for her Hanes size 6 hipster panties. She got a few steps away from my register, came back, and said
"This might be a dumb question but...um, we're going to a chapel. And we bought these for the body. We only need one, the black one, for the body. Do you want the other two?"
In my head I'm thinking "What the hell? You bought these for a dead body at the chapel? Like for a funeral? Sweet baby Jesus, this is a weird situation" But in real life I said "Sure. Yeah, ok. Thank you." Because I love free things. And it seemed rude and wasteful to say no. And it did not appear that her or her companion could wear a size 6. I asked her for the receipt so my manager doesn't think I'm trying to steal panties. Is that weird, or what?

Batteries

"If you need batteries, you can walk around."

This woman today tried to tell me the Energizer AA are a different size from the Duracell AA, which were, of course, a different size than the store brand AA. Apparently the Energizer looks bigger than the Duracell (which ended up being the kind she bought) and the store brand looks too small.

What A Ridic Day

Today was actually kind of terrible. Aside from me working different hours (9am-5pm), I did not have a good day.
I had a weird feeling everyone was mad a me, that I wasn't part of the in-crowd. I felt a lot like I did when I first started. I wasn't on the register, and when I answered IC3s I felt nervous about ringing people up. I just felt like I was doing something wrong, and no one liked me. I know this is all in my head. But then I did do something wrong:
On Friday my manager and I were organizing the Hallmark aisle and we decided all our pre-assembled Valentine's gift bags could be in the seasonal aisle. I thought we could take down the Home Elements display, because they looked un-classy and out of place. So on Friday I confirmed with the store manager that I would do this. Today while I was giving myself projects I called the store manager and told him what my plan was. He said that was fine. After I was all done disassembling the bullshit Home Elements display, the EXA came up and told me I should check with him first about any moving of merchandise. He told me to take down the bags and put his display back up. I let my temper flare, which in retrospect was an unprofessional and a bad idea. He told me that the store manager had no idea what I was talking about. I confronted the store manager and evidently that was true. Jesus Christ.
The other super-obnoxious part of this day was the woman I helped in Aisle 9. She couldn't decide what Claritin she needed, but she wanted the one that was on sale and the one that matched her coupon. Which unfortunately for her, were two different Claritin counts. Then she wanted a bonus box. Which we didn't have, and as I was explaining to her that everything we have is out, or on the inventory-only top shelf, she interrupted me to tell me to go upstairs. Her tone was very rude, so I circled around the store and came back and told her the same thing. As I was ringing her up, I told her coupon wouldn't work because the count of the product was specified on the coupon and she had the wrong count. I swiped it anyway because she told me, and somehow it went through, which was extremely irritating. Then she wanted to stack her manufacturers coupons and I wouldn't swipe it, so I called the manager. When he was gone she said,
"That was all you had to do. All you had to do was just try it. You act like this is your store. You are too young to be so uptight about these coupons. You are too young to be so unfriendly. I'm not even shopping for myself, I'm just trying to be a good person and shop for someone else. I hope you learned something about coupons."
Between each sentence she paused as if waiting for me to say something. I just stared off into the distance because if I had spoken, it would have sounded like this: "Bitch, I am the Coupon Queen! I know all about coupons, but I don't know why our register took a coupon for a product you are not purchasing. And that makes me mad! And you acting as if you are better than me makes me mad. And you telling me to do something that is not actually allowed makes me mad. If I have to follow all the coupon rules, than so do you. Get out of my store. Because as a profit-sharer, I do feel a sense of ownership around here."
Good thing I just stared off into space, huh? I feel better. Tomorrow will be better.

Update

I didn't work at the store today; I worked at my other job instead. However, I realized that I missed writing on Thursday and Friday. So here is my update.
Thursday:
I worked the Hallmark aisle with my favorite manager and while I was scanning the order sheets for cards, an older woman came up and said
"Just the girl I wanted to see. Can I ask you a few questions? About the ring in your lip?" She was a close talker so I took a step back and said
"Sure"
"Umm. I was wondering, about the thing in your lip...did a doctor do it? Because I used to have my ears pierced and one of them seemed to have closed up." I didn't have the heart to tell her I pierced my lip myself (also it makes me sound crazy) so I said she should go to a piercer.
"So you don't think a doctor will do it?"
"No ma'am. What you need to do is go into a piercer at a tatoo and piercing parlor. A doctor will not, and probably should not, re-pierce your ears. But I will say that you should go to someone who uses a needle and not a gun. Because the needles they use are hollow and take out the flesh as opposed to the gun which just startles the flesh and pushes it out of the way. Thats why some people get those little bumps on the back of their ears. That would be the startled flesh trying to move out of the way."
She looked startled herself by this point and said "Well, wherever do I find someone who will do this?
"Just type in 'Piercer, city'. The one I like is down in the city, if you ever go down that way.."
I hope she knows what I meant by "just type in.."
Friday:
Friday was my BIRTHDAY!!! and although my fave coworker bought me a Monster, I have decided that I will never work on my birthday again. Although whenever I told someone how old I turned, they were surprised. Evidentially I look much younger. I'm not complaining. I'm just saying.
Someone told me I should get my charts done because Neptune is moving in or out of my area and Saturn will be within my orbit next year. Big changes are coming soon. I think. Maybe I should get my charts read. Or done.

The Last Letter

Dear S.B.A,
So glad you're back! We missed you!
Heart, Kimbrella