Crisis Averted

One of my regulars said he always needs a project. Jokingly, I said,
"Can't you watch t.v like everyone else?"
"Well, I could just go back to watching Mean Girls."
" I would go ahead and not tell people that."
He made a grimace face and the guy behind him busted out laughing. And now I feel kind of bad. Perhaps I shoud make amends.

The new guy stopped in again. Just like he did last night.

The Magazine Lady!

I was ringing people up and trying to mind my own business, when I noticed who was in my line. It was The Magazine Lady! I was so happy to see her! We had lost contact, and she was aggravated. I forgot how funny she is. She says I should start a Mommy Blog. I agree.

All my fears and my feelings regarding my co-worker were for naught because she quit this morning. So I got my panties in a bunch for nothing.

We could have gotten out early, but there was a woman who wanted to use a whole bunch of WIC checks at 11:57pm. Which is ridiculous.

Today was actually a pretty good day.

Reasonable Accommodations

By 'reasonable accommodations', I mean that I got to sit in my chair today. Because I wasn't working on any project besides ringing people up. And when I was pregnant with my last kid, I also sat down a lot. So there.

My newest new coworker called himself my 'gaurdian angel' because he swoops in to save me from long lines and needy customers. Ridiculous.

I felt a little out of it and weird today. And my shift seemed really long, but not unbearable.

On my fifteen minute break, I painted my nails with Brilliant Shine by Revlon, in a sparkly lime green. (Maybe not the best choice for my skin tone)  It's a relatively new nail polish that doesn't need a top or undercoat. Which I love because I have hard time getting all my coats on without smudging one.

The midshift guy left early. Again.

I told two high school boys about that girl and how she was mean, and that my other co-workers agree, and they should stay away from her and her friends if they don't want to get involved with her bullshit and all that comes with her activities.

I am dreading my next shift because I have to work with someone new, and I'm not sure if she likes me, or if she thinks I'm too slow or... what. It is just really awkard working with her. I guess I will just mentally prepare myself for my lunch at a time I don't like, and my calls not being answered.

An obese man with a normal-sized head, arms, and hands, bought almost $50 of junk food. I tried not to assume that it was all for him, but I think it might have been.

A grandma was buying candy for her grandson. He started to open a package of gum, and I pointed that out to her. She took it away, and he freaked out. He yelled, and she spoke to him harshly in her (their) native language. He was too big for her to physically control, but she still ended up dragging him out of the store. I hope he didn't get the candy she bought for him right away.

A customer mentioned she was buying all this candy for her students. She said they were disturbed, and I said,
"Yeah. Right?"
"No, really. I work with the emotionally disturbed boys in the 8th grade."
"Oh, wow. Did we have this conversation?"
"We did. But that's ok."
"Sorry about that. I get a lot of customers."
She said that the kids she works with are in-residence. And they are very disturbed. I wanted to ask her for an example about their disturbing behavior. Maybe next time.

Fetal Movement

The fetus (baby?) was kicking and moving around a lot after my lunch. He seems to have moved up closer to my belly button instead of hanging out all the way at the bottom. Anyway, while I was ringing up a younger jocky-looking guy, I gasped and held my abdomen. I think I freaked him out.

Luckily there was a mid-shift today, because I asked her several times to watch the Register so I could run to the restroom.

One of my regulars came in with a baby not even a month old. Apparently that baby was hers. Her oldest is 20 (she had him when she was 17). She asked if I knew she was pregnant. I said I didn't really know, because she didn't have baby bump. She just looked kind of fat. And she had been wearing big winter coats. I told her only the last reason.

Me and the New Guy discussed other co-workers, and the madness of our customers.

Tomorrow night is the same crew.

Cop-Calling Anxiety

A group of girls came in and I had to tell one of them to leave or we would call the cops. But I can't call the cops so I was waiting on my manager. But my manager was too nervous to call, so I ended up looking like a lying hard-ass. I was told by a few managers to call the cops on her...obviously my manger didn't get that memo. The guys with these girls were the ones I had complimented to their mothers. One of them was annoyed that I let these girls scan their candy. The other was alarmed about them following them around. I told him not to hang out with them because he will get in trouble by association. And I mentioned his mom.

I'm not sure that the new lady likes me. My manager had two projects for me, so he pulled me off the register and put her on. It took me a long time to finish everything because I was ringing people up, helping customers, and getting stuck on other things. I apologized that it took me so long. Then I came back to the register so we could start closing. She said, as her face turned red and she started looking pissed, and said,
"The thing about that is, I was supposed to be in camera, and I was on the register all night. So I'm not going to close in camera."
I said,
"Thats' fine. No problem."
But then she left the register. So I stayed up there for another 45 minutes while she did overstock and took her lunch, I think. I told her I thought she might be from Undercover Boss. I hope she likes me.

Easter Clearance

I got kind of dizzy at the register. I'm kind of dizzy now.

Almost all the Easter stuff actually rang up as 50% off. I only had to price modify the plants. I was impressed with our system.

Evidently corporate has decided that different store managers (and the DM and a few others)  would check in on other stores. And they have a check-list and if your name gets written down too many times, you get fired. This sounds like a lot of work for everyone. No one came in tonight.

A really ghetto girl came in seemed either very high or kind of stupid. And she spit sunflower seed shells all in my candy aisle.

A almost-regular came in with shorts on. He is a pretty laced-up looking guy, but I noticed a tattoo on his leg. It was a group of three balloons-as-skulls. I told him his ink reminded me of Stephen King imagery. Which he seemed surprised, but pleased, about.

The woman in photo waited a while to start her closing duties. And she didn't even know what she was  supposed to do. But even though she started way late, she finished way early. I don't know how she did it, but I'm reluctant to believe she finished everything she was supposed to. Just sayin'.

Yesterday And Today

YESTERDAY:
Yesterday there was a series of egg fiascoes. We had (have) a strict limit of two, and that just stressed out the whole damn neighborhood.
A husband-wife team came in to get twelve dozen cartons of eggs. I told them absolutely not, and I had to call my manager to confirm this. Then the husband asked me if he could use his points,  but the register didn't say how many points he had, so I told him he had none. And he threw a little hissy fit, paid for his purchase, and saw his points on the receipt. Then he tried to make me feel stupid. Which didn't work.
A woman came in wanting to buy six cartons, which I told her was not possible. Again I had to call the manager. After some argument, the woman behind the egg bandit offered to purchase two cartons for her, if she gave her the cash. So now she gets four. And then the egg-buyer wanted me to get her eggs for her, which I would not do. She asked the guy behind to buy them for her, and he looked alarmed because he didn't know what was happening. I explained, and he declined her money. So this crazy egg-buyer got six cartons for $4.04.

TODAY:
I didn't greet a member of corporate as he came into the store because I was with a customer. Then management called me into the office and I thought I was getting fired. I was not, I just had to fill out a form verifying that I was a U.S citizen.
I mentioned to my tonight-manager that the last-night's manager said it was ok that I left my overstock. Because I was the last to clock out, and it was late. Apparently it was not ok that I left all that overstock and the store manager and his sister-in-law were pissed. And the last-night manager didn't tell them that he said it was ok, so tonight's manager said he would pass that on. Right on, man. Way to get my back.

Young Sir

Whoa, we were so busy tonight. And we were short. So I got out at 1:01 am.

One lady who seemed to be around my age started talking about babies. Becuase she noticed I was pregnant, and she has a WIC check for Enfamil. She guessed how far along I was because
"you seem kind of small to begin with and usually small girls are all belly but aren't that big"
"Oh, well, I feel huge most of the time."
I told her about my Cheeto obsession. And I told her my next goal is to get a burrito from my old neighborhood. She is the second person in two days who seem surprised I know that intersection.

My co-worker came in on his day off. He smelled really weird; like onions, smoke, b.o, general food, and something unidenifiable. Very weird. He convinced my manager to tell me to take a half gallon in place of a quart for a WIC check for another co-worker's wife. I wrote on the check and the reciept that the manager approved it.

It took me a long time to finish my overstock because my feet hurt again. And because no one helped me.

Stepford Wives and Rosemary's Baby

Today was actually kind of pleasant. We got to leave early. And I conversed with my manager in a way that didn't embarrass me.

The newish woman was working...she did o.k. I feel weird about telling her what to do because she is older than me. And sometimes she is not a good listener. And I'm pretty sure she likes me but I'm not 100%

The co-worker who was leaving when I was arriving gave me a backwards compliment. Today my make-up includes a slight cat-eye with black eyeliner and black mascara. I put my bangs in a pouf-clip. She said that she kind of likes my green eyeshadow (I wore that yesterday) because even though it looks crazy, I still look cute. What the hell kind of statement is that? And then she told me that I was an idiot for not wearing my eyeliner like how I have today, everyday. Uhhh, thank you?

I feel like my writing could be a lot better...than what I have been doing lately.

Friendship Dates

I helped a regular scan prints of himself, him and his girlfriend, and him and his daughter. This guy is kind of weirdo, and he remembers a phrase I said to him several months ago. He had several different orders and I told him that he should do one big order if he wants to save some money.

A woman came in and wanted to know how fast I could do a canvas print. I told her I would give me at least a half hour. She looked distraught. Then she had me call another store to check how long they would take. Another one said it would take an hour. So she waited while I scanned her image, printed out an 11x14, assembled the canvas, and framed it. While I was doing so, we talked about much we liked photos and photo gifts. I mentioned how important I think it is to take images of the seemingly mundane. I was printing a photo of her dad standing on the edge of a train, holding a bell. It was his job in the old country. At the beginning of our interaction, I was going to tell her that poor planning on her part doesn't constitute an emergency on my part. I was glad I didn't though, because we had a good chat.

I enjoy being in the photo department because I like looking at other people's pictures. I think printing out photos is underrated.

I Like Your Contrasting Patterns

Things seem just a little more 'thug-life-4-eva' when a certain co-worker is working.

The tweaker let the gangbangers in his car to check the subwoofers. The gangbangers stole his phone. The tweaker freaked out and came back in (our store) all stressed out wanting to use a phone. He also knocked on the door when we were closed, wanting a phone book. Really though, who would think it would be a good idea to let two thugs in your vehicle?

A woman came to my register and she was singing along with our background music. Then she let me know that she still had a photo of me from that day she had one extra photo left in her disposable camera. That day I was taking in her order for her disposable camera, and she had one picture left on her roll. So she took one of me with a goofy smile and two thumbs up. And when she shows people her Disney World photos, they have been asking who that girl is. We shared a few giggles over that.

There was a dance at a nearby school, which caused a lot of nonsense a girls wearing leggings as pants in my store.

It's Warm Out

The warm weather brought out a lot of activity and crazies and kids.

I was ringing up a regular for his smokes, when his friend (who I recognized) asked how my kid was.
"The one on the outside is awesome, but the one on the inside is making my life difficult. Inside me, not inside prison. Just so we're clear."
They laughed.
My non-regular asked if I had remembered what his friend had said to me. I did not. But he remembered almost our entire conversation. Before I had a chance to tell him that was a little creepy, a youngish guy and girl came in. The newly-arrived guy was very happy to see my regular. They hugged and the new guy told his woman to get his number, and they were all chatty and happy, and kind of included me in their conversation. I guessed correctly that the newest guy had recently gotten out of lock-up.
He told me he didn't really understand computers...while he was looking at the pinpad.

My regular child-customer was trying to purchase a bunch of snacks for some girls he wanted to be friendly with, and a few of his guy friends. His Link card didn't go through. They all had to put their stuff back, and I could tell he was embarassed. He is a small guy, much shorter than anyone he comes in with. I think he has some street cred because his brother is in a gang.

Right before I went on lunch, three tall guys were at the register, after having spent some time talking about me farther back in the line. I think. And when I was ringing them up, they talked about the cars they were selling, how much money they make, and just generally being dicks. When my husband called, it was obvious I was taking a personal call. One guy told me, in a falsetto voice, not to take my personal calls. Then the guy asking for change wanted singles for his five. Because he was going to the strip club. I just looked at him crazy.

We got out on time.

Day Six

I am totally exhausted. Towards the end of my shift, I started to get really weird. And tired.

Day shift is way different than the night shift. I took a picture of myself, with a disposable camera, while I was in the parking lot, before I went to punch in. The sun was shining in my face and the parking lot was almost empty.

I was hoping to see some walk-of-shamers, but I was disappointed.

Day Five

I should be sleeping because I have to be at work at 8am. I'm covering for someone. And I told my manager that the odds of me being there on time were not good.

I like my co-worker, but she is really old-school. She is younger than me. And she doesn't believe in out-of-wedlock pregnancies/babies, or abortions, or the Morning After Pill. She and her family are very happy that I will be having my second BOY because boys are more valued in their culture.

The guy at One wanted me watch the register while he went to do his overstock so he could leave early. I told him no, because I wanted to make sure I got my stuff done. And he always takes a long time when someone lets him off the register. So there.

I just ate my newly purchased bag of Pirate's Booty. It was 2/$4. (2/$3.40)

Day Four

I saw a girl wearing a sweatshirt from the college I went to. I told her that I went to that school...
"and look where I am now."
It seemed like she was thinking about pretending to have not heard me, but then she asked what I majored in.
"Photography. Maybe I should have been a art business major or something."
"Yeah, well, I'm in a Fine Arts major, so thats' not much better."
Perhaps I should have told her I really didn't apply myself in college. Or that I partied a lot.

I had to be on the Register again today, because the new guy was working on the cooler. The register is ok...but because of the delay and the incessant questions on the card reader each of my transactions take longer than I think it should.

I got the lunchtime I wanted because I asked for it at 6:40, and the woman who also wants 8:30 doesn't know how to assert her lunches very well. I take advantage of that.

I saw two small children in the Hallmark aisle. They did not know each other but one kid got real close to the other kid. I asked the dad of one of the girls (I think I had gone to school with him) if they knew each other. He said 'no' and we shared some personal-bubble laughter about small children.

One of my regulars came in with his mom, and I told her that we really like him because him and his friend are usually pretty funny and he doesn't act a fool. I told her that whatever she is doing to help him act like that, she should keep it up. They both grinned.

One woman told me that she thought I would be a fun mom. Yes ma'am!

Day Three

I am tired and dizzy.

A woman came to my register and I feel like I should have made amends for possible past misdeeds. Although if she was in the neighborhood for the reason I think, she will be back.

I told a few of my regulars about my absurd day at the Social Security office.

My husband came in and bought me some Cheetos. I was talking to him in the other line when a girl I recognized came to my line. She was wearing almost-transparent white leggings with leapord print boy shorts. Totally inappropriate. She seemed to think it was odd that I would be making someone buy me Cheetos, until I told her he was my hubs. Then she asked if I lived in town. I like her because she isn't afraid to say whatever crazy-ass thing is on her mind, but in a respectful way.

Day Two

We sell Gak! I asked my younger co-worker if she remembered it from Nickolodeon. Which she does not.

I took and sold three passports today.

My purchase was pretty sweet. I got:
big canister of store-brand coffee ($4.99, $8.49 retail)
a Paas egg-coloring kit ($1.99)  buy two get 2000 points
a Paas egg cup kit ($1.99) buy two get 2000 points
two bags of regular Cheetos (2/$2)
one bag of Chester Flamin' Hot Fries (2/$2
a can of Arizona Sweet Tea (49 cents with a in-store coupon)
I had a $5 coupon, and my discount, and got 2000 points on this purchase.
I paid $5 and change. 70% off

I helped my manager in the candy aisle with the hopes that he would notice me doing stuff and playing nice. I'll let you know.

The Checkout

While I was at the register a disheveled woman came up. She told me not to touch her stuff, because she wanted to ring it up herself. So she swiped her stuff by my scanner and scanned her items. She didn't want help, but she did want me to help her with the bags. And then she tripled-bagged her stuff. She wrote a check, and wrote in the wrong date. And then she got fussy when I asked for her ID. When she asked for her smokes, she needed them from the middle of the shelf. Then she asked for my name, which I think she wrote on the inside of her pack.

I believe I might I have over-shared again, with my manager. I don't feel like I'm engaging in harmful gossip, just sharing what I people have said to me (I don't share secrets though). I just get really nervous because...I just do.

I worked with the new lady, who has been a regular customer of mine for about three years. So that's weird and cool.

I thought about Cheetos, but I didn't buy them.